Friday, January 09, 2009

Changes Are Coming

By Holly Olson.

Over a year ago I made a suggestion that would change my life forever. I told my husband that he should start blogging. So, for better or for worse, I am in great part responsible for the beast that I have unleashed on Montgomery County, and to a lesser extent, the state of Maryland.

It started off harmlessly enough. I frankly was tired of coming home every night and having to listen to my husband rant for hours on end about assorted local political drivel. Why should I be the only one to be enlightened (suffer) by (from) this endless source of wit and wisdom? So, I did what any good wife would do — I tried to push it on someone else. My husband was a frequent reader of Just up the Pike, so it seemed natural for him to provide the occasional guest post. Soon, he began guest posting on MPW — and from there it steamrolled. Now he is the main contributor, typically posting at least once a day. He even has a Facebook page, where MPW readers can become ‘fans’. As if his ego isn’t big enough already...

My husband still shows no signs of slowing down. However, there is something that may just put a kink in his plans for mass domination of the Maryland liberal blogosphere — a baby. Yes, Adam and I have a bun in the oven — a little baby Olson-Pagnucco (BOP) due in the first week of June.

So to prepare you all for what is to come, I feel that I must lay down some rules (for my own personal sanity) — for if Adam had his way, he would probably continue to call up his ‘spies’ and post from a wireless laptop while we are in the delivery room. So come June, here are Holly’s NEW RULES:

1. No more ‘calls’ to/from local politicians after 7pm. It always amazes me how he can yap for an hour or more to one of the pols — I swear he is like a teenage girl in high school, but instead of gossiping about who is going out with who or what so-and-so wore, he talks about who is running for x seat or who is on the outs with Mike Miller. Pleasseeee...

2. No more week night ‘dinners’ with local politicians (or weekend dinners for that matter). OK, I have to give Adam some credit here. He has improved. He went through a spell this past summer where he was going out to dinner with some local muckity muck at least three times a week. Um — hello, you do have a wife! After about a month of that behavior I threatened to remove certain body parts essential to the male anatomy, and he straightened up quick. But just so he doesn’t start fantasizing about getting out of diaper duty so he can drink beer with a new ‘informant’, I figured it would be good to reinforce this rule.

3. The final and most important rule is a biggie. It will take the most self-discipline, and probably require a bit of help from you all. Adam must blog less. The daily postings, the staying up till all hours of the night, the weekend afternoons dedicated to blogging, MUST be minimized. Yes, Adam will still be up all hours of the night — but it will be for taking care of BOP and not MPW. I realize that this will probably take great will power on Adam’s part, for in many ways, blogging has become a bit of an addiction. It may even require an intervention. So I am asking all of the readers, females in particular, that if you see Adam posting too much, you must remind him of his parental responsibilities. Tell him that instead of dishing the latest local political dirt, he should instead be removing the last round of poop.

So there you have it folks. Get ready for BOP! I expect BOP to be quite feisty. When I had an ultrasound several weeks ago, the technician commented on how active it was and difficult to pin down (sound familiar?)! But have no fear, I am not banning Adam completely from blogging. I will still allow him to post on occasion. And I might add that this would be a great time for all of you wanna-be bloggers to step up to the plate and start providing guest posts. There are plenty of insightful, witty, and thoughtful readers out there who could offer a post or two a month. So let’s keep MPW alive and active — but let’s do so as a community endeavor. After all, I know that you all will continue to need your political fix — baby or no baby.