Guest Blog: Living with Discrimination as a Transgender Woman

My name is Maryanne Arnow, a transgender woman, native Marylander, and Montgomery County Resident of more than 35 years, openly living in mainstream public society.

In the last year, I've had to face distinct increases in discrimination and denigration from the general public in the normal course of my daily life. This is occurring directly as a result of a local campaign from conservative groups that continually foster unwarranted fears, stereotypical misrepresentations, and highly negative references to transgender people, in the public eye of perception.

I have faced extreme social and workplace humiliations in the last several years since beginning my transition (change) of gender. I have applied at dozens of restaurants, retail stores, warehouses, and even major hotel chains such as Marriott, most located in Montgomery County.

I have walked into the ThaiTanium restaurant in Kentlands, professionally and appropriately dressed as always, spoken to their dining room manager, and been told that they were in fact hiring with positions open. I was then told the next day by one of their kitchen managers, who was callous and smirking at best, upon realizing I was transgender, that there are no positions available.

I applied years ago with P.F. Chiang's restaurant at White Flint Mall, prior to beginning my transition. They all but begged me to enter their management training program at that time, based on my resume, interviews, and obvious qualifications. I reapplied last year, upon learning they were still hiring throughout their company. I spoke frankly to more than one manager as to the changes I have made since the first time I had applied, the last of which was cold and callous towards me. I have yet to have had one follow-up call returned since then.

I applied at a retail clothing store in Rockville - Loehman's on Randolph road. The manager was ready to hire me for retail and management training until I informed her I was preparing to transition in gender. She told me that I would have to keep it under wraps, and I was never contacted again after having two interviews with them and basically being told I was going to be hired.. All attempts at follow up were avoided by their staff, and my calls never returned.

I even applied at the Starbucks shop next door to where I live - Kingsview in Germantown. I had spoken with one of their shift managers that has been friendly to me, and specifically asked that I come in to apply, as they were hiring, and he knew I had years of service industry experience. Upon interviewing with the store's general manger, he spent more time looking around the shop to see who was watching us, than any attempt at sincere eye contact with me. They have never returned any follow up to me. The list is so long I cannot even detail it in this letter. It all smacks of intolerance, and unwillingness to give highly qualified people a chance, apparently based more on outward appearance, than professional qualifications.

As it now stands, it is both legal and apparently still socially acceptable to discriminate against anyone like myself in hiring, workplace, housing, public services, and public accommodations. I once again have no civil rights or legal protections at any level. Not federal, state, or county, and mainly as a direct result of the actions of these groups to force a referendum on this law.

We have been burned at the stake, in the use of guilt by association to other highly negative stereotypes such as pedophiles and sexual predators. This has nothing to do with transgender people whatsoever. This is an outright lie. It is a crass, cruel, and disgusting distortion. This is an utter fallacy to the fullest extent that it has been used by these groups.

As a fellow citizen, neighbor, wife, and daughter - as a warm and articulate person, and skilled professional Culinary Artist, I have found this intolerably painful. This is entirely unacceptable by any ethical standard that I know of. There have been direct, and deeply negative impacts on my life as a result of such discriminatory behaviors.

Enough is enough. Help restore my most basic civil rights, and overrule the falsehoods being spread by these groups, once and for all.

Most Sincerely and Respectfully always,

Maryanne A. Arnow

Note: For more on this issue, see our post from February, "What Transgender Opponents Really Think." And if you would like to help Ms. Arnow, visit Basic Rights Montgomery.